Huzzah!

Ever since….I blame “ever since.”

That night I had a sudden lapse of judgment

That night I went assumed that the saints were at my side. I failed miserably, terribly.

That night I asked the question at the wrong time.

Unforgivingly fatal mistake. 

That afternoon during a splendid performance, wherein those lyrics were home-bound to your heart, wishing it’d hit its’ mark.

That night after a splendid performance, testing the remaining luck I had..yet getting the answer I did not want.

False wishful thinking.

That rainy morning when I thought it would be fine to see you.

That rainy morning when those tables separated us miles apart, when in truth we were just snapping distance from each other.

Wrong place, wrong time.

My self esteem with you…it just hit an all time low. 

Don’t wonder when I’m too scared to accept that phone call invitation. I don’t trust myself that much anymore. 

I might mess up. I don’t wanna mess up whatever that’s left of this.

I’m scared.

Maybe if I engaged myself in that wired conversation, I might tremble, say things I don’t mean, say things I might regret. So i’d rather not get on with it.

Ever since.

Forgive me.